Months, Part II

At first I was going to do the months in two segments of six months each, but then I decided why not stretch out a bad idea into three features? If you want to know why I'm rating the months of the year in the first place, go read Months, Part I. If you've already read it, or don't need any explanation right now, read on.

May: Hands down one of the best months of the year. The weather is generally nice without being too hot, and when I was in university and only work part time, I was out of school but not working too much, so May provided a superabundance of relaxing time. Plus the fact that kids are still in school scores points for May over the high summer months, and also like those months, we aren't overwhelmed with tourists. Oh, and TV viewers have got to love that May is a sweeps month and season finale time, which is cool. May is the best of all worlds, unless you happen to be a skier, which I am not. May is very, very Good.

June: The third month in a row that is a legitimate name, June has is a sweet month with a lot to offer. First month of summer, generally excellent weather, kids are in school for the majority of it, tourists aren't out in force, so it's all Good.

July: While a lot of people like July, I think it's probably the most overrated month. Much of the time it's just way too hot and the humidity can be unbearable. School kids are everywhere, school kids tourists are plentiful, everything on TV is in reruns apart from Who Wants to Be a Millionaire, which has gotten about as stale as that last bagel which has been in the fridge since last Tuesday. Sure, you can go to the beach, but if you aren't a sun-worshipping beach type that gets tired quickly, which is Bad.

August: I decided to go and look up "Dog Days" because I was tired of not knowing where the whole "dog days of summer" thing comes from. Apparently it has to do with the rising of Sirius, aka the Dog Star. (Remind me some day to rate names of stars, with names like Sirius, Polaris, and Betelgeuse it should offer plenty of entertainment. But I digress, and this isn't that department.) The on-line dictionary I consulted also described dog days as "a period of stagnation or inactivity" which sure fits August. Pretty much nothing happens in August. No holidays, hot weather, and a proliferation of back to school sales, which I don't think anyone really likes, with the possible exception of people that sell school supplies. And at the end of August there lurks the dark spectre of summer's end and a return to school, which when I was growing up stole the joy from being out of school. Ugly.