Even More New TV Shows

It happens every year around this time. It happened last year a little later than usual, but it still happened. This year it seems to be a touch early, and a bit clustered. There has been a pile of shows debut over the last few weeks, so I can't possibly review them all. I should point out that every show I've reviewed I have watched at least two entire episodes, and so I feel I can be as harsh as I have to. So, without further ado, here is the third edition of the Fall 2002 new TV Shows rating.

The Shield (Global Friday, season two on FX in January): Remember when NYPD Blue debuted? Yes, I know, it was a long time ago. Back then people said that it redefined the genre of cop show with its grit and realism. Perhaps it did. Now the genre has been redefined again by The Shield. This show is The Sopranos of 2002 (and like the Sopranos, don't even consider letting your kids watch this). It burst onto the scene from a cable network that no one had taken seriously to grab viewers and critics by their throats and throw them up again the wall. Oh, to win one of the big Emmys (Michael Chiklis for lead actor in a drama). When I heard this, my reaction was that no way he should have won over Kiefer Sutherland for his portrayal as Jack Bauer on 24. Then I saw The Shield. Michael Chiklis as Vic Mackey deserves that award. He deserves a Lincoln Navigator full of them. Why does he deserve these awards? Is he not just playing another tough cop who plays by his own set of rules? Well, Vic Mackey takes the rule book and uses it to beat confessions out of suspects. And that's on a good day. He's not a good cop who does questionable things. He's a bad cop who does bad things and yet he's the good guy. He's the kind of guy who would scare Tony Soprano. He makes the show. That said, the supporting cast is excellent. I've rambled on about The Shield for long enough. Just let me say that the last minute of the first episode is the single most jaw dropping minute of television I have ever seen. I'm calling this Good or else I'm afraid Vic Mackey might show up here and beat me with my steel travel mug.

Firefly (Fox/Global Friday): A ragtag bunch of misfits on a space ship travels around the outer edges of civilization avoiding the authorities and getting into trouble. No, it's not Lexx. This is Firefly, Joss Whedon's new show. It wants to be the PG-13 anti Star Trek, much like Whedon's big previous success, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, is the PG-13 vampire show. So is Firefly as good as Buffy? No. At least not yet. The first season of Buffy was far from perfect. It wasn't this ambitious, though. Firefly has a lot of characters and a lot of complicated relationships between them, but so far there doesn't appear to be a lot of continuity from episode to episode, so it's not like you can really pick up a thread and follow it. Oh, about those characters, some of them seem somehow familiar — the big strong guy with a feminine name, the nerdy-cute girl engineer, the educated guy who's very proper and has an accent, the guy who tries hard but is mainly comic relief, the sister who the bad guys are looking for, the hot girl who is always impeccably dressed and is for some unknown reason hanging out with this bunch. About the only thing the show is missing is vampires and a slayer. But you can't really have a show called Buffy In Space, can you? That might look Bad.

Editor's Note added much later: Firefly turned out to be a really enjoyable and good show that was cancelled before its time, but managed to find a large enough fanbase that now there is a movie based on the show. I'd like to amend the rating to Good.

Less Than Perfect (ABC/CTV Tuesday): Most of us are less than perfect. I know I am. I come close, but I do fall short. This show may be less than perfect, but it comes close. There hasn't been a good workplace sitcom on ABC since Sports Night was cancelled. In fact, I can't think of a good new workplace comedy on any network since then. Now there is one. This is the basic fish-out-of-water premise, but it goes beyond the cliché and it really works. And get this, the main character is a woman who's not a size six. That's right, a woman who is the lead on a TV show and has more than 3 percent body fat — and isn't named Oprah. The mind boggles. It's about time, if you ask me. After all, stout guys get their own shows all the time. Drew Carey has two. Of course, like any good workplace comedy, this has a strong cast, including Eric Roberts (yes, that's Julia's brother) and the always amusing Andy Dick. It's easily the best new comedy this fall, and ABC has done a Good thing by picking it up for the entire season.

Puppets Who Kill (Comedy Network Friday): I have described Less Than Perfect as the best new comedy. Well, this is the worst. It's a blatant and bad rip off of Greg the Bunny. That show was a brilliant and delightful creation that Fox let die without hesitation. This show besmirches Greg's memory. Yes, Greg the Bunny was about some misfit puppets. It was, as Fox promoted it (at least until the debut) "a puppet show — on Fox." That means it wasn't for kids. Well, Puppets Who Kill isn't for adults either. The characters on Greg the Bunny were dysfunctional but funny and largely likable. These puppets are none of the above. Well, apart from the dysfunctional, they have that locked down. So far the character getting the most attention is a teddy bear named Buttons who is promiscuous on a level that would offend rock stars. But you know what my biggest complaint about the show is? Apart from the weak writing, lackluster acting, contrived plots and the considerable profanity, it's that the spirit of the show is intensely mean-spirited. Don't watch this show. Yes, the Comedy Network is promoting this heavily, but that's only because someone who works there is obviously retarded. And you know what else? The puppets don't kill. Not even a little bit. Call me old fashioned, but I think a show called Puppets Who Kill should feature some puppets who actually kill. Not living up to your billing is just plain Ugly.