More Practical Jokes

I did this first back in September, and it was popular, so I'm doing it again. There appears to be a certain amount of demand out there for good practical jokes, beyond my current Prank of the Month. So here are a few more. I've gone with some quick and easy ones this time, since the last bunch featured some stuff that was a bit complex and/or time consuming.

Disclaimer: Some of these practical jokes could get you into a considerable amount of trouble if you get caught, so don't get caught. If you do, don't say that we told you to do it. Dontmindme.com accepts no responsibility for anything you do. We're just giving you the directions.

That's the Rumour...

If you work at a reasonably large company, at least big enough that everyone who works there isn't on first name basis with everyone else, just start a rumour that the victim is being let go. You can have the story featuring them being fired for some reason, or merely part of a departmental downsizing, but be creative. If you have anyone at work who likes to gossip starting such a rumour should be easier than finding bad television shows on the Comedy Network. Be sure to use words "I heard. . ." and "but don't tell anyone." The rumour will get back to the target soon enough, and if they aren't completely confident in their job security (and let's face it, who is these days?) they will start to panic. This is easy, fast, and sufficiently mean.

The Wonders of Duct Tape

I have no idea if this one will work or not, but it's easy to execute and seems feasible. Merely take a length of duct tape maybe two feet long and make a reverse loop with it so the sticky part is on the outside. Put this on the road, and it will stick to the first tire passing over it and make all sorts of unpleasant tire noises. At speed it's going to sound like a flat. You can pull this on total strangers by just laying a loop of tape out in the middle of the road, or one any with a suitably long driveway so they won't see the tape on the way to the car. This might even work by applying the reversed loop of tape directly to the victim's tire, but they might notice that too easily. Try it out.

Or Best Offer

Where I live there is a weekly publication called the Buy, Sell, and Trade which lets people place free classified ads for items for sale. I don't know how many other places have a similar publication, but I suspect it's common enough. All you have to do for this one is place an ad for your target's car (or house, for that matter, but the car one is more believable) at a ridiculously low price. Be sure to give the victim's phone number. As long as the ad is running the target will get phone calls offering to buy the car. It doesn't get much easier than this.

You Didn't See Nothin'

I promised to do easy pranks this time, but here's one I couldn't pass up — it's just too twisted. Stage a mob hit. You'll want a sufficiently loud starter pistol or two, and a big car, preferably dark in colour. You'll also need at least three people, maybe more. Stop the car where the victim is sure to see what's happening, and have one person leap from the car and start running. Make some noise to attract a little attention. Then 'shoot' him with the starter pistols. Fire off at least half a dozen shots, and make sure the person being shot makes a good show of it. Then drag the victim back to the car and put him in the trunk. Get out of there fast. If done right, it will take less than a minute from the time you stop to the time you drive off. If you don't feel confident you can pull this off quickly enough, instead of having the shooting target run for his life, just have him climb into the trunk, have him make a lot of protesting noise, and shoot him there. This is best done at night, obviously, and in a quiet residential area where there won't be regular police patrols. Also, you want to do this one to a victim who doesn't know you, or at least won't recognize you at a distance, and won't recognize the car. You might want to obscure the licence plates with some mud, just in case.